First, I want to give props to Marlborough Unrec Horse Trials. I sent them my concerns about Woody’s XC time penalties and they handled it wonderfully.
Obviously, since it was past the 30 minute protest window they couldn’t change the standings, but they did change the website and offered me some support in return for thier typo. They did the math and to come in at 2:00 I would have had to tackle the BN XC course at 740 mpm. In the Cold-Ass Stinging Rain. Dear LORD.
Anyway, they’re Super nice people and I can’t recommend the event enough.
So the past week has been all over the place. I’ll summarize:
I rode Ozzy for YEARS. I bred him and trained him for all 8 years of his too-short life. He was an Appendix QH. Mostly TB, but the QH desire to conserve energy is STRONG in his people.
To call him sensitive would have been obtuse. There was no whispering to Ozzy…You had to TELL Ozzy. Unless it was about dinner. You could whisper “dinner” from 3 acres away and he’d hear you. Heaven forbid he miss the two handfuls of grain he needed in order to look moderately pregnant.
Woody? Not so much. There is Whispering. There is nuance. There is THINKING about something and it happening.
Then there is me, trying to figure it all out. I had a lesson last week that made me feel CERTAIN the ASPCA was going to show up at my door. I could make a bunch of excuses that might border on potentially valid explanations, but while they would make me feel better? You rarely learn anything from listening to excuses.
So, I allowed myself to feel sorry for myself and to miss Ozzy. And I DID miss Ozzy. And that missing Ozzy made the feeling of inadequacy EVEN more intense. I didn’t miss Ozzy because I don’t love Woody (Man do I love that red little freak). I missed Ozzy because he’s gone.
That’s it and that’s all. While THAT part of it was genuine “come by it honestly crazy”, it in NO WAY made me less thankful for Woody. They’re different, and we learn from different. When I spoke to Allie about it she of course, worded it perfectly:
“But look at it this way–he’s a totally different ride, and you get to learn TOTALLY different skills, so really, him being a bit tough and not what you are used to is really good for your riding ability! You’re going to be like a ninja!”
So THAT’S what I focused on and you know what? Yesterday and today I harnessed my inner Ninja and Woody and I had two REALLY good rides. Even WITH him being in for 2 days due to the rain.
And there you have it. The barn is my happy place. It’s my therapy. It’s where I KNOW I can go to get away from everything; where everything but the barn and all the good stuff it entails, melts away.
But you know what? NOTHING is a totally void of the crazy, it seeps in everywhere. The Crazy is like a ninja.
I’m going to beat that Ninja’s ass.